It’s hard to be Joy when my name is Joy
“I am Joy.” You’ve probably heard that phrase before. When I say, “I am Joy,” what I am saying is, “I am surviving joy when my name is Joy.” You’d think that would be a good thing, right? Sometimes it’s a little bit of a curse because my name is Joy. I am always expected to be happy; to emulate joy. No matter what happens in my life, no matter how bad things get—they do get bad sometimes—I’m supposed to be smiling, laughing, and cheerful. And if I’m not? People wonder what’s wrong with me, why I can’t just be happy. People expect me to be happy all the time. I can’t imagine what it would be like not having this “surviving joy” thing hanging over my head all the time! If you’ve ever felt that way yourself—if you’ve ever been expected to smile through pain and pretend that everything is okay when it’s not—then you know how hard it can be to maintain a happy face. If you’ve ever felt this way, then you also know that sometimes being happy isn’t the best thing for everyone else around you. It’s not just a matter of being able to smile when you don’t feel like it; it’s about having your feelings dismissed or invalidated because you’re not happy enough.
When you are named after an emotion, it’s easy to believe that your life is automatically filled with joy. But for me, that’s not always been the case. My name sometimes limits others’ perceptions of me and makes them see me as one-dimensional. This can be hard when you have feelings that don’t always match happy or joyful. As someone who suffers from depression and grief, I know what it feels like when people are constantly telling you to smile more because they think it will solve your problems. It’s frustrating when people don’t understand what kind of struggles go on inside your head every day.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately because I’ve been feeling like my name is a burden instead of a blessing. People expect me to be happy all the time, but there are so many things in my life that make me sad or angry or annoyed or frustrated. I put on a happy face all the time, but sometimes it’s just not there. But how do I explain this to people who don’t understand? How can I explain that it’s okay to be sad? Will people understand when I explain that my name does not reflect how I am feeling all the time? How do I explain that sometimes life just sucks and you have no choice but to deal with it (as much as you don’t want to)?
The dichotomy of surviving joy
The dichotomy of surviving joy is the fact that you can’t be joyful without also having experienced pain. It’s the idea that you can’t have one without the other. Surviving joy doesn’t mean being happy all the time. It just means that when you’re not happy, you know how to find happiness again. This dichotomy is something we all experience as humans, and it’s an important part of life. If we only focus on happiness and don’t acknowledge the other emotions that come with being human, then we will miss out on so many things in life. In this world, there is no such thing as joy without suffering. It’s not that we have to experience sorrow before we can experience happiness—it’s that when we do feel happiness, it’s only because we’ve experienced sorrow. You can’t appreciate the good without acknowledging the bad. This is something that I’ve learned from my own experiences.
I have been through a lot of pain and loss in my life, and I’ve learned to appreciate happiness more because of it. It’s made me stronger and more resilient. I have learned that life is not all about being happy; it’s about feeling all the emotions. If we focus on the good and ignore the bad, then we won’t be able to experience any real happiness in our lives. There’s nothing wrong with feeling pain or sorrow because it means you’re alive. We have emotions and feelings, which is what makes us human. We are all capable of experiencing great happiness and joy. However, we must be aware that there will always be sorrow in our lives—it’s part of the human experience. We should not try to avoid it; rather, we should embrace it.
The fact that we are able to feel happiness is a testament to our ability to survive, but it’s not something we can take for granted. It’s like a coin with two sides: on one side there’s the bright, shiny, happy part—the joy, excitement, and love for life that we all know and love. But on the other side? That’s where things get interesting. The other side is dark, sad, pain, and sometimes scary—but it’s also where we learn how to survive. They are two emotions that are inextricably linked to one another, and they’re both necessary for us to appreciate each other. It’s important to acknowledge its presence in our lives so we can learn from it—and so we can grow as people.
It’s like the saying: “If you don’t fight the darkness, you’ll never know what light is.” And who wants to live their life without ever knowing what light is? The truth is that every person has darkness inside of them—whether it’s a little or a lot. The only way for us to overcome this is by learning how to live with it and understand its purpose in our lives. This can be done by exploring what it means, where it comes from, and how we can use it as an opportunity to grow as individuals. So, how do you fight darkness? You acknowledge it. You face it head on—and then you learn from it. It’s a process, but once you’ve learned to live with your own dark side and accept it for what it is, life becomes a lot brighter.
So how do we survive?
We learn how to build up our defenses against anything that might hurt us again or make us feel bad about ourselves. Then we start building our walls higher and higher until they’re impenetrable—or so we think. We can’t run from our problems, but we can learn to face them head on and accept that they are part of who we are. It’s important to understand that darkness is not something that needs to be destroyed or removed; it’s a part of life and should be embraced.
I have heard the saying, “Joy is easy.” And it’s right. Joy is easy. But surviving joy? That’s not so easy. I don’t know about you, but for me, surviving joy means learning how to embrace the struggle. It means realizing that sometimes happiness is going to be hard work. It’s knowing that there will be times when I feel like the world has caved in on me, the walls I once built have torn down, and I’m left feeling helpless. I know that my emotions are going to be powerful and unpredictable. I must learn how to handle those things when they happen. But how do I learn how to handle those things? I must accept that I’m not always going to be happy. It means knowing that sometimes my sadness can be just as beautiful as my joy.
I think a lot of people believe happiness should come easily—that if we are doing everything right, then we will feel good all the time. When it doesn’t happen this way, we think there is something wrong with us. But it’s not that simple. Happiness takes work. It’s a choice you make again and again by doing what’s right for you. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be happy. You should want to be happy, and it’s important to focus on being positive as much as possible. But if we only focus on happiness and don’t acknowledge the other emotions that come with being human, then we will miss out on so many things in life. The truth is, when we focus on happiness alone, we miss out on the full range of human experiences. We don’t allow ourselves to feel sad or depressed because it’s not “positive.” But these emotions are important too. They give us perspective. This is why it’s so important to acknowledge and accept the fact that we are all human. We aren’t perfect. I’m not perfect. Things won’t always go according to plan. We will have good days and bad days, but it’s the bad days that make us stronger. It’s the bad days that help us appreciate the good ones even more. It’s the bad days that allow us to see how strong we truly have become. So, the next time you feel sad or depressed, don’t try to ignore it. Sit with those feelings and let them come through so that you can process them. Then, when you’re ready, rise up from the ashes like a phoenix and find something new to be happy about.
Conclusion
So take time today to reflect on your own life experiences. What have been your greatest joys? What about your greatest pains? How have those experiences changed you? How do they influence who you are today? How do they make you feel? What can you learn from them to help you grow as a person? We all have our own unique stories. Some of them are happy and full of joy, while others are painful and filled with suffering. What can you do to help yourself move forward and towards a better future? Is it time to seek out therapy? Or maybe just some new friends who will listen and support you through whatever life throws at you.
Thanks for stopping by Surviving Joy! I’m so glad you’ve found me! I’d love to hear from you, so feel free to drop a comment below or shoot me an email on my contact page with any questions or concerns. I’m always looking for new ways to improve my content and make it more useful, so if there’s anything in particular you want me to write about, please don’t hesitate to reach out! If you’re interested in receiving email updates when new posts go up on my site, just click the subscribe button at the top of the page—it’s easy and free, and you’ll never miss out on anything new!
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